A Long Distance Relationship (LDR) is one of the hardest situations you can get yourself in. LDRs are not just about couples, they are also true for families with one parent or both parents or children working abroad. It is a setup that requires a lot from the parties involved, whether it is a couple or a whole family.
While I was reading/researching about this topic, I have come across a number of sites/blogs that give advice about LDRs; but after reading through, I honestly feel there are 4 most important things, people in LDRs should be aware of: Communication, Patience, Trust and Love.
Communication
When someone is away, you lose touch of them, you do not get to see them, nor do you get to hear their voices; so what do you do? Thanks to technology, we can be almost face to face with the people we miss, with just a touch here and there and viola a video call bridges the gap between us. Gone are the days of our grandparents when they would send snail mails through the post office just to get in touch with their loved ones living overseas. With the advancement of technology, communicating with our loved ones across the miles is easier and in real time; we do not have to wait until they get our message and for them to send one back, it is instantaneous already. I always believe, if you miss someone, call; it is that easy. You pick up your phone and just call. For those in LDRs, communication is vital, I would like to consider it the vitamin supplement that helps the people involved in the relationship to get through the everyday worries. Hearing the voice of your loved ones and seeing them on the screen is probably the next best thing to hugging them for real. Sometimes, the mere sight of them on the other end brings us to tears and all we can start saying is Hi. Talking about what is happening in each other's lives gives the people involved a sense of belonging. It is a chance to express support for each other. It is the perfect time to validate each other's presence in our lives. It is an opportunity to assure each other that no matter the distance, there is love and that everything will be fine.
Patience
Of course, when someone is living thousands of miles away from us, time is seldom on our side. Timezones are the worst obstacles in LDRs, especially if one lives half way across the globe where one is sleeping, and one is having lunch; and by the time the other gets home, the sleeping one needs to leave for school or work. And as I said, the key is to communicate, BUT let us face it, LDR or no LDR we do not have the luxury of always being readily available to accept a call. We might be in class, taking an exam. They might be in a meeting. She might be having an appointment with her doctor. He might be practicing football, basketball, soccer, etc. The next key is to be patient. I guarantee you, it will not go exactly the way you both planned that facetime, all the time. Patience and understanding is important.
Trust
Even if our loved ones lived close by, we are not 100% sure of where they are, what they are doing, who they are with 100% of the time. So it goes the same for those who live oceans away. The next key is to trust. Trust that the other will not do anything that will jeopardize the relationship. Trust that the other is faithful. Trust that the other also trusts you to trust them back. Ladies tend to overthink and create scenarios in their heads that they end up worrying, crying over their own doing. Trust, you will know sooner or later if everything is okay or not, but for the moment at hand, you need to trust.
Love
"... And the greatest of these, is love ... "
Love dictates communication. If you love someone, you miss them. If you miss them, you want to be with them. If you want to be with them, you do whatever it takes to hear them, see them.
Love is patient, it does not keep a record of wrongs, it waits and endures.
Love always trusts. It confidently relies and believes the best in people. It does not entertain negative thoughts.
A real relationship has love. Without it, there is no care and no trust; and is therefore not a real relationship anymore.
Not everyone is designed tohandle a long distance relationship. It takes guts. It requires a determined spirit. It demands a strong heart.
If you are in one, I salute you and I wish you all the best in making it work.
Wow what a great read! LDRs are defiently a bit scary as well but with the right amount of effort anyone can make it work!!
I have been in a few LDR's, they dont work for me either it's the timezone, not being able to talk whenever u feel like.
The trust because I have been lied to in allot of LDR's.
Or just the simple thing that the person is not physically there with you, you cant hug or kiss them only text or talk it does not really work for me i need the physical in a relationship.