[DOF] Advice on getting married

Hello everyone, PinkPolka9182.. here.

So today I will be giving you some advice on getting married and what it can bring to your life. Being married is a special bond between two people and it's for the rest of your life. So here's some tips about getting married to that special someone.

Marriage is a decision, not an accomplishment.

I believe marriage is absolutely cause for celebration, but nowadays it seems more like a rite of passage that many people covet. Don't get me wrong: I remember the days when I would watch Say Yes to the Dress and flip through engagement photos on Instagram or Twitter, wondering when my turn would come. This is normal single-girl behavior when kept in check. But in the midst of all my pining and drooling, I started to view marriage as an item to cross off my to-do list, rather than the risky, serious, and beautiful decision that it is. Here's what we should be celebrating: staying happily married for five years...10 years...15...20. When we make it to any of those milestones, bake us a cake or throw us a party. Until then, we haven't really accomplished our goal. So I find it best to view marriage as an ongoing decision. A daily one.

It's not all about comfort or security.

Marriage provides many comfortable moments. Giggling together after farting in bed is not something I do in the presence of most person. There are times when my fiance and I share feelings of closeness that feel so amazing, I want to wrap myself in them like a blanket.

 You better learn how to apologize.

I had NO clue how bad I am at apologizing, I suck at saying sorry. As a recovering perfectionist, admitting my mistakes drives me absolutely bonkers. Sometimes I have to mouth the words "I'm sorry" a few times before I can actually get them out. But you must learn to get the words out. Marriage doesn't work very well when one spouse sucks at apologizing.

Create a clear vision of your shared future together.

Sit down, listen to each other and write out how you want your future as a couple to look. It's much easier to create your best relationship together if both people's needs are voiced, heard and supported by their partner.

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