In one of the radio shows of DOR, DJ Lemons,-, asks what is our favourite color— and I can’t stop myself from sharing how the world changed my love for which is known the color of “happiness”— the color yellow.
It is summer, year 2010. I was 8 years old. You would expect someone as young as that to explore and play during summer, but no, I was always at home. Mornings was spent doing chores, afternoon for trying to find something to do, and at night, I’ll practice some stunts until I’m tired— just so I can sleep. These quickly became a routine and the four walls, the four yellow-colored walls of my room seems to know me better than the people I am with.
Days and months have passed, it is now year 2011. A new summer has come and the young me crosses her fingers and closes her eyes to wish for an eventful summer, one different from last year. Sometimes, how quick your wishes become granted and truly, it was an eventful one but not the eventful I wished for.
It is still year 2011 and mom got depression, I think it is depression? I don’t know, things have changed. A lot. Now, mornings was spent crying because she is experiencing an episode, afternoon for trying to find something to do-- to help her, and at night, I stare blankly at the yellow walls of my room. Wishing that it gives me the aura of happiness that it always gives, but it failed and maybe, it changed too. Or maybe I was the one to change? Nearly three weeks later, her older brothers come at our home to personally fetch her. They said they can take care of her better just until she is better again which I agreed upon, I was young, I don’t know anything about the world and definitely, I don’t know anything about mom. All I can remember that day was going to my room and noticing something is off— the color yellow of my room doesn’t radiate as it did before.
Again, months have passed, and mom came home— finally. I took swimming and football lessons to cope with the temporary loss and when school came, I was asked what is my favorite color, and I was stunned. I keep visualizing the yellow-colored walls that turned pale overtime and bluntly I answered— “I don’t have one.”
aAAAAAAAAAAAH this was so painful to write. It's like reliving an old sting. I hope you enjoy reading this! A note: when someone asks me what is my favourite collor, I still say yellow because it is so hard to explain. Anyway, I love writing for you guys! Comment down below your thoughts! See you in the next one!
As time goes by, our perceptions change either from something or someone. This world--the environment in which we live in--shapes not only ourselves but our perceptions as well. Things change in due time. This is Traversing through time, personified. Wonderful!
Like how Russ said it in the chat, it takes maturity and may I add, bravery to be able to share pieces of your life with people you do not really know on a personal level. But then again, it is easier for us to share with "strangers" because it gives both us and them the anonymity, reducing the risk of judgement. For me, my favorite colors are blue, grey and dark brown. FYI, the do not suggest a light yellow shade for rooms because yellow also connotes sickness in the medical field, like they can't easily see if the patient is turning yellow already for maybe hepatitis or other liver problems.
But anyway, lovely brave post Raven... maybe you should have red as your favorite color now, red for bravery and strength. Looking forward to reading more posts...
That was a very real and emotional post. Great job here, ROUXE!
That was a truely moving piece of work that I am thankful you shared despite being hard in your part. As Lav said, sometimes it is a lot easier to share these rough parts of our lives to strangers who barely knows us despite them not knowing everything and I am thankful for your bravery to do so. Yellow has been one of my favorite color too, like deep in I really enjoy and love wearing yellow and having yellow due to how bright and happy it is.